Oh noes! Those hateful haters in the Republican party are MAILING PIPE BOMBS to places that are almost guaranteed not to harm anyone, least of all the Democratic politicians and media figures who are the putative targets!
Clearly this means we have no choice but to a) disarm all Americans and b) vote for Democrats. The logic is irrefutable.
Explosive devices addressed to Hillary Clinton’s home and the house of former President Barack Obama were intercepted, and the Time Warner Center that is home to CNN in New York City was evacuated after a suspicious package was sent there, officials said.
Investigators are working to determine whether the two devices addressed to Clinton and Obama are connected to a pipe bomb found earlier this week in the home mailbox of billionaire George Soros near where the Clintons live in Chappaqua, New York, multiple law enforcement officials told ABC News.
I haven’t seen anything this Fake News since a literal actor “attacked” Comet Pizza by firing a single gunshot at the floor when the owner was out. I mean, at least when the Nazis Fake-Newsed the Reichstag, they actually burned it down.
UPDATE: Okay, this is even more fake.
A suspicious package has been found at U.S. Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz’ office in Sunrise, police said. “Yes, I can confirm there’s a suspicious package and we’re handling it right now.” Broward Sheriff Scott Israel said.
Broward County Sheriff’s Office… now that does sound familiar, does it not?
UPDATE: Well, now we have a good idea who mailed them… to himself and others.
CNN on Wednesday reported that the suspicious package that forced an evacuation of its New York headquarters was addressed to former CIA director John Brennan, a frequent Trump critic and MSNBC contributor.
UPDATE: The Littlest Chickenhawk characteristically weighs in:
If your first reaction to some evil person sending bombs to a variety of politicians on one side of the aisle is “FALSE FLAG,” you are officially deranged.
– Ben Shapiro
Or, you know, capable of basic pattern recognition. I guess it takes more than a 115 IQ to figure that out.